I’ve lost the vivacity of the dream the crystal aliveness of its glitter that happens so clearly in the first blush of going after a new discovery and traveling with it where it needs to go and where it wants to take you it’s not to say I have lost it but this dream is certainly different I think I was in training for it for this dream and the vivacity going a bit pale then fading altogether into the daily doing of bringing it to the light of real day where others can too see it I think I was in training for this inevitable fading that when I write of it here just now I realizing isn’t a fading so much as a solidifying and solidifying by nature looses much of its glimmer and translucent reflection and refraction so it is that not a fading I was in training for this when abroad and that dream becoming just another place and another job on many levels yet as well a wonder and awe each step too training there because I was in it so deep living it so vitally and have come away now to be able to look back and follow its course from dream to reality and know somewhere in me that I did that so therefore this time as I tick the boxes on today’s long list of to-dos that this too big dream taking on roots and even legs and growing truck and torso while maybe less vivid in the sparkling dream-sense of which it began is no less real and really a whole lot more real now and therefore calling for all the more reason to embrace and uphold and rejoice and stand in awe
runon: it’s been packed down
