disgruntled
frustrated
holding a grudge
not against
as if someone’s slight
just holding
foolish I know
knew it from the moment I held it in my hand yet there it was
rolling around my palm all the day long
as I paint my sons garage
alone
then a run for supplies
alone
to the grocery for lunch and provisions
alone
then off to other sons home
alone
to vacuum his floors and wash his walls
alone
no one said I must
nor even expects it
well maybe one does….
I just do it
hold myself to the level
that never quite settles into position
always more
alone.