that place~

‘You need to get to a place in order to discover what thing you are looking for.’ Paul Theroux

I keep thinking I need to quit Facebook.

Or at least take a sabbatical.

Or try out ‘less is more’….

Decidedly all noble and honest pursuits, but I continue to not do so, and then turn around and wonder at the why of feeling I need to in the first place~

It occurred to me that the very thing I feel guilty about spending too much time at/on, is the very thing creating that guilt! The irony was not lost…..

Facebook was created to foster community; among other things~

And in creating community it’s established ways and means for people to express, contemplate, share and explore more than ever before (no big revelation here I know; bear with me)

And in this environment the arena of thought-exploration and sharing extends to wondering at the extend to which we are ‘wasting’ time on Facebook, in this community….establishing it’s own guilt engine! Facebook has created its own undoing.

And yet, it will never happen.

I for one, regardless of the guilty moments, will not quit. I wont take a sabbatical (unless forced one due to no wifi….) and go for ‘less’ only when I am deep into teaching……

(my FB cover photo and profile image)

                             Patricia Baldwin Seggebruch

When I came to that realization it was admittedly a light bulb moment; my Facebook time is not ‘too much’, not in need of a sabbatical; over used or abused…

It is though in need of a shift in my qualifying of it~

I have ‘gotten to this place’ to discover that what ‘I have been looking for’ is community.

Just like the advent of cable TV, microwave ovens and even the computer before it, Facebook came on the scene as a luxury; an addition, a delicacy  that was an addendum to our lives, not a main feature.

But with time, rapidly mind you but yeah, with time, it’s come to be a given; a ‘taken for granted’, a main feature in life or even, as it is for me,

a necessity.

You see, living 15000 kilometers from home, family, native country and traveling a vagabond lifestyle is discombobulating.

Don’t get me wrong; I recognize that my home, family, community is much broader and far reaching than the latitude and longitude of Seattle, Washington, but there’s a sense of ‘alone’ that comes with travel; with the downtime in between the live and in person connectings of workshops and demonstrations that makes one realize they are well…..

alone.

And, far, far away from those particular people who would drop all they’re doing to give a live and in person hug when needed…regardless…..

There are different depths and definitions of community….

but I digress~

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The disconnection is palpable some days and the distance is actually a tangible entity, a third person if you will,  in the room with John and I, at some times.

It is disheartening to think of milestones occurring and us not being close enough to celebrate them.

Or even worse, to let the mind go and imagine (stop that!) a tragedy that would take not minutes or hours to attend to, but days…..

Facebook for me is anything but a luxury, a frivolity or a waste of time.

Certainly there are moments when I come back to myself and realize I’ve been mindlessly surfing through posts, listening to my brain pass comment on other peoples’ goings on….

But all in all, each moment is a blessing.

I get to stay in touch.

I get to see what’s up.

I get to comment, message, update and ‘like’ in real time!

Or as close as someone can who is living a day ahead of her native world…..

And for this I will not take a sabbatical.

Facebook is my community when John and I feel too just two to call such.

And I hold tight to it’s presence.

It may have been born in a place of ‘extraneous’, and it certainly will come under judgement for years yet to come, but for this girl, I’ve set my mind.

I am blessed to have this connection and with a big happy-girl smile I thank you, Facebook, for providing this life-line in this way of living that could so easily have me pulled under and disappeared~

in love.

trish