|EncaustiCamp 2011 I bow to you 🙂|
It occured to me, just this morning, why after two weeks I haven’t been able to come to this blank white spaced blog window and write about EncaustiCamp.
I’ve tried! I’ve opened the ‘new post’ box no less than a dozen times, stared at it in earnest, then gone to a participants blog or an instructors musings and posted them instead….
ECamp 2011 was so above and beyond all my wildest dreams for it. I can’t seem to wrap myself around the whole and put the experience into words that service as a nice bundle of thoughts, tied up with a beautiful ribbon and put away in a tight package.
It’s not that I don’t want to write about it, or that I am ill equipped to do so; I love to put my thoughts and emotions out here to share unabashedly! But with EncaustiCamp it’s been different.
And this morning it dawned on me as to why.
I can’t look back.
ECamp 2011 carried a weight and measure like nothing else I’ve ever done or been a part of. I compare it only to giving birth. The crazy, beyond-pain process of bringing new life into the world; only to get through the process and feel so deeply, so passionately, so emphatically filled by the power of love and connectedness that you will do it again; gladly and without apprehension of the still-lingering pain that is required in the bringing-forth process.
That’s what it is like.
That’s what the whole of EncaustiCamp was like for me.
That big. That amazing. That miraculous.
And I thought I was done at four children :)))
And I can’t look back and summarize or compartmentalize what it was and how it felt in any sensical way. I can only let myself be carried on the tide of all of it and continue on to more creating and growing and building.
I think it’s how it’s meant to be.
When something this big, this substantial, this miraculous is born the thanksgiving, homage and respects-paying to it are best done in the looking forward.
In my case, in the doing it again; only better.
So that is what I do. What I’ve been doing since returning; actually since finishing the final moment~Looking forward to the next.
There is something bigger than just encaustic in it. There is something bigger than just sharing art. There is something bigger than just connecting and inspiring.
When I try to grasp it, it feels too big, too grandious for this one small human form
…so I pull back.
But, as long as there is this sense-of something so much bigger than ‘just’- I will do it again.
As long as there is this inexplicable joy spent, I will do it again.
And as long as there is room for miraculous, yes even in encaustic, I will do it again.
As long as it’s in me~
in love. trish